The 'Middle
Wife'
by an Anonymous 2nd grade
teacher



I've
been teaching now for about fifteen years. I have two kids myself,
but the best birth story I know is the one I saw in my own second grade
classroom a few years back.

When
I was a kid, I loved show-and-tell. So I always have a few sessions with
my students. It helps them get over shyness and usually, show-and-tell is
pretty tame. Kids bring in pet turtles, model airplanes, pictures of fish
they catch, stuff like that. And I never, ever place any boundaries or
limitations on them. If they want to lug it in to school and talk about
it, they're welcome.

Well,
one day this little girl, Erica, a very bright, very outgoing kid, takes
her turn and waddles up to the front of the class with a pillow stuffed
under her sweater.

She
holds up a snapshot of an infant. 'This is Luke, my baby brother, and I'm
going to tell you about his
birthday.'

'First,
Mom and Dad made him as a symbol of their love, and then Dad put a seed in
my Mom's stomach, and Luke grew in there. He ate for nine months
through an umbrella cord.'

She's
standing there with her hands on the pillow, and I'm trying not to laugh
and wishing I had my camcorder with me. The kids are watching her in
amazement.

'Then,
about two Saturdays ago, my Mom starts saying and going, 'Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh!'
Erica puts a hand behind her back and groans. 'She walked around the house
for, like an hour, 'Oh, oh, oh!' (Now this kid is doing a hysterical duck
walk and groaning.)

'My
Dad called the middle wife. She delivers babies, but she doesn't have a
sign on the car like the Domino's man. They got my Mom to lie down in bed
like this.' (Then Erica lies down with her back against the
wall.)

'And
then, pop! My Mom had this bag of water she kept in there in case he
got thirsty, and it just blew up and spilled all over the bed, like
psshhheew!' (This kid has her legs spread with her little hands miming
water flowing away. It was too much!)

'Then
the middle wife starts saying 'push, push,' and 'breathe, breathe. They
started counting, but never even got past ten. Then, all of a sudden, out
comes my brother. He was covered in yucky stuff that they all said it was
from Mom's play-center, (placenta) so there must be a lot of toys inside
there. When he got out, the middle wife spanked him for crawling up
in there.'

Then
Erica stood up, took a big theatrical bow and returned to her seat. I'm
sure I applauded the loudest. Ever since then, when it's show-and-tell
day, I bring my camcorder, just in case another 'Middle Wife' comes
along.

I prayed for you before we met,
Not knowing who you'd be.
I asked the Lord to send a friend.
One chosen just for me.

I asked that they'd be Godly,
With wisdom of His ways.
A friend to help and guide me
I the troubles of these days.

So often in life, we need someone
To listen while we talk.
Someone who will not condemn or judge,
But encourage us as we walk.

The narrow road we choose to follow
May sometimes make us stumble.
But to have a friend to catch our fall,
Teaches us to be humble.

When I asked the Lord to send a friend,
Though many came and went.
He gave much more than I ever asked,
For you are the friend He sent.

A stranger seated next to a child on airplane.

Stranger turned to her and said:
Let’s talk.

Child: What would u like to talk about?

Stranger: How about Nuclear power?

Child: Very interesting topic.
But let me ask u a question.
‘A horse, cow & deer all eat grass.
Yet
deer excretes pallets,
cow flat potty
&
horse clumps.
WHY’?

Stranger: I have no idea!

Child: Do u really feel qualified enough to discuss nuclear issue when u don’t know [censored].

I think somewhere, sometime, I may find
A friend who will be forever true,
With a heart of beautiful eternal love
Maybe it will be somebody new.

I'll imagine a heart so very caring
And a willingness to share,
A delightfully sweet sense of humor
With spontaneous care.

They shall know how to keep a secret
And when to turn to prayer,
Not needing to always chat
But glad to just "be there".

Might I search away in the blue yonder
Or shall I look behind,
I'm feeling such a sweet tickle inside
Someone special is coming to my mind.

Oh then, why should I search so far and wide
For a friend of God's design,
When your heart was prepared before I prayed
Waiting for me, there all the time.

Make new friends, but keep the old;
Those are silver, these are gold.
New-made friendships, like new wine,
Age will mellow and refine.
Friendships that have stood the test -
Time and change - are surely best;
Brow may wrinkle, hair grow gray,
Friendship never knows decay.
For 'mid old friends, tried and true,
Once more we our youth renew.
But old friends, alas! may die,
New friends must their place supply.
Cherish friendship in your breast-
New is good, but old is best;
Make new friends, but keep the old;
Those are silver, these are gold.

I believe in angels,
the Kind that heaven sends
...I'm surrounded
By angels, but I call
Them my best friends

'Twas The Night Before Christmas,
He Lived All Alone,
In A One Bedroom House
Made Of Plaster And Stone.

I Had Come Down The Chimney
With Presents To Give,
And To See Just Who
In This Home Did Live.

I Looked All About,
A Strange Sight I Did See,
No Tinsel, No Presents,
Not Even A Tree.

No Stocking By Mantle,
Just Boots Filled With Sand,
On The Wall Hung Pictures
Of Far Distant Lands.

With Medals And Badges,
Awards Of All Kinds,
A Sober Thought Came Through My Mind.

For This House Was Different,
It Was Dark And Dreary,
I Found The Home Of A Soldier,
Once I Could See Clearly.

The Soldier Lay Sleeping,
Silent, Alone
Curled Up On The Floor
In This One Bedroom Home.

The Face Was So Gentle,
The Room In Such Disorder,
Not How I Pictured
A United States Soldier.

Was This The Hero
Of Whom I'd Just Read?
Curled Up On A Poncho,
The Floor For A Bed?

I Realized The Families
That I Saw This Night,
Owed Their Lives To These Soldiers
Who Were Willing To Fight.

Soon Round The World,
The Children Would Play,
And Grownups Would Celebrate
A Bright Christmas Day.

They All Enjoyed Freedom
Each Month Of The Year,
Because Of The Soldiers,
Like The One Lying Here.

I Couldn't Help Wonder
How Many Lay Alone,
On A Cold Christmas Eve
In A Land Far From Home.

The Very Thought
Brought A Tear To My Eye,
I Dropped To My Knees
And Started To Cry.

The Soldier Awakened
And I Heard A Rough Voice,
"Santa Don't Cry,
This Life Is My Choice;

I Fight For Freedom,
I Don't Ask For More,
My Life Is My God,
My Country, My Corps."

The Soldier Rolled Over
And Drifted To Sleep,
I Couldn't Control It,
I Continued To Weep.

I Kept Watch For Hours,
So Silent And Still
And We Both Shivered
From The Cold Night's Chill.

I Didn't Want To Leave
On That Cold, Dark, Night,
This Guardian Of Honor
So Willing To Fight.

Then The Soldier Rolled Over,
With A Voice Soft And Pure,
Whispered, "Carry On Santa,
It's Christmas Day, All Is Secure."

One Look At My Watch,
And I Knew He Was Right.
"Merry Christmas My Friend,
And To All A Good Night."

May my friendships always be
The most important thing to me;
With special friends I feel I'm blessed,
So let me give my very best.
I want to do much more than share
The hopes and plans of friends who care;
I'll try all that a friend can do
To make their secret dreams come true.
Let me use my heart to see,
To realise what friends can be,
And make no judgements from afar,
But love my friends the way they are.

Sent this to my friend oldhag,but think it is appropriate for all good friends

There's nothing to fear --- you're as good as the best,
As strong as the mightiest, too.
You can win in every battle or test;
For there's no one just like you.
There's only one you in the world today;
So nobody else, you see,
Can do your work in as fine a way:
You're the only you there'll be !

So face the world, and all life is yours
To conquer and love and live:
And you'll find the happiness that endures
In just the measure you give;
There's nothing too good for you to possess,
Nor heights where you cannot go:
Your power is more than belief or guess ---
It is something you have to know.

There is nothing to fear --- you can and you will.
For you are the invincible you.
Set your foot on the highest hill ---
There's nothing you cannot do.

In that dark lonesome place
between a dream dreamed
and a dream realized,

I have left a little light for you
so you will know that someone cares
and believes in your dream.

Just where it becomes the most dark
and difficult to find your way,
there is the light I left for you.

It will light your way,
through the doubt, the confusion,
and the fears,

It will stay with you
all the way to the realization
of your dream.

And when your dream has come true,
please go back to that darkest place
where you have been,

And set the little light there to give heart
to the next sweet soul that braves the path
to his or her dreams.

Dreamers are the architects of greatness.
There wisdom lies within their souls.
Dream long enough and hard enough
and your dream can be attained.