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Kay, My Forever Friend
Sep 18, 2007 | 8:01AM
One year ago today, I lost my best friend to cancer. She was 39 years old. I don’t know how to describe how I feel today - mad (that she was taken so young), glad (that she is in a better place), or sad( that I lost my best friend). I have heard it all - she is not in pain anymore, she is in a better place, etc., but that doesn’t help - not today - I miss her!
Hugs, hugs, and more hugs,
~Angie~
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Summary of My Last Year On the Computer
Aug 30, 2007 | 5:52PM
Summary of My Last Year On the Computer
I must send my thanks to whoever sent me the one about rat poop in the glue on envelopes because I now have to use a wet towel with every envelope that needs sealing.
Also, now I have to scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason.
I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl (Penny Brown) who is about to die in the hospital for the 1,387,258th time.
I no longer have any money at all, but that will change once I receive the $15,000 that Bill Gates/Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in their special e-mail program.
I no longer worry about my soul because I have 363,214 angels looking out for me, and St. Theresa's novena has granted my every wish.
I no longer eat at KFC because their chickens are actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes or feathers.
I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day.
Thanks to you, I have learned that my prayers only get answered if I forward an e-mail to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes.
Because of your concern I no longer drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet stains.
I no longer can buy gasoline without taking a man along to watch the car so a serial killer won't crawl in my back seat when I'm pumping gas.
I no longer drink Pepsi or Dr. Pepper since the people who make these products are atheists who refuse to put "Under God" on their cans.
I no longer use Saran wrap in the microwave because it causes cancer.
And thanks for letting me know I can't boil a cup water in the microwave anymore because it will blow up in my face...disfiguring me for life.
I no longer check the coin return on pay phones because I could be pricked with a needle infected with AIDS.
I no longer go to shopping malls because someone will drug me with a perfume sample and rob me.
I no longer receive packages from UPS or FedEx since they are actually Al Qaeda in disguise.
I no longer shop at Target since they are French and don't support our American troops or the Salvation Army.
I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a number for which I will get a phone bill with calls to Jamaica, Uganda, Singapore, and Uzbekistan.
I no longer have any sneakers -- but that will change once I receive my free replacement pair from Nike.
I no longer buy expensive cookies from Neiman Marcus since I now have their recipe.
Thanks to you, I can't use anyone's toilet but mine because a big brown African spider is lurking under the seat to cause me instant death when it bites my butt.
Thank you too for all the endless advice Andy Rooney has given us. I can live a better life now because he's told us how to fix everything.
And thanks to your great advice, I can't ever pick up the $5.00 I found dropped in the parking lot because it probably was placed there by a sex molester waiting underneath my car to grab my leg.
Oh, and don't forget this one either! I can no longer drive my car because I can't buy gas from certain gas companies!
If you don't send this e-mail to at least 144,000 people in the next 70 minutes, a large dove with diarrhea will land on your head at 5:00 PM this afternoon and the fleas from 12 camels will infest your back, causing you to grow a hairy hump. I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of my next door neighbor's ex-mother-in-law's second husband's
cousin's nephew's friend's beautician.
Have a wonderful day.
~Angie~
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Some of my favorite quotes
Jun 06, 2007 | 9:51AM
Some of my favorite quotes:
A good exercise for the heart is to bend down and help another up.
Life is what we make of it - sorta like Play-Doh.
The bubbling brook would lose it’s song if you removed the rocks.
Happiness comes through doors you didn’t even know you left open.
Everything is always okay in the end. If it is not - then it is not the end!
Here is a test to see if your mission on Earth is complete - if you’re alive, it isn’t.
Never approach a bull from the front, a horse from the rear or a fool from any direction.
There is a destiny that makes us brothers/sisters. No one goes his way alone; all that we send into the hearts of others, comes back into our own.
Pain and suffering is inevitable, but misery is optional.
Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened.
Your talent is God’s gift to you. What you do with it is your gift back to God.
Always laugh when you can. It is cheaper than medicine.
However long the night, the dawn will break.
A silent mouth is sweet to hear.
If every man would sweep his own door-step the city would soon be clean.
The best way to destroy an enemy is to make him a friend.
Nobody gets to live life backward. Look ahead, that is where your future lies.
Be the change you want to see in the world.
Friends are God's way of taking care of us.
No act of kindness, however small, is ever wasted.
60 percent of the time, it works every time.
Good friends are like stars, you don't always see them but you know they are always there.
Remember, life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
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NIGHT WATCH------
Dec 07, 2006 | 6:02AM
NIGHT WATCH------
A nurse took the tired, anxious serviceman to the bedside. "Your son is here," she said to the old man. She had to repeat the words several times before the patient's eyes opened.
Heavily sedated because of the pain of his heart attack, he dimly saw the young uniformed Marine standing outside the oxygen tent. He reached out his hand. The Marine wrapped his toughened fingers around the old man's limp ones, squeezing a message of love and encouragement.
The nurse brought a chair so that the Marine could sit beside the bed. All through the night the young Marine sat there in the poorly lighted ward, holding the old man's hand and offering him words of love and strength.
Occasionally, the nurse suggested that the Marine take a breather and rest awhile. He refused. Whenever the nurse came into the ward, the Marine was oblivious of her and of the night noises of the hospital - the clanking of the oxygen tank, the laughter of the night staff members exchanging greetings, the cries and moans of the other patients. Now and then she
heard him say a few gentle words. The dying man said nothing, only held tightly to his son all through the night.
Along towards dawn, the old man died. The Marine released the now lifeless hand he had been holding and went to tell the nurse. While she did what she had to do, he waited.
Finally, she returned. She started to offer words of sympathy, but the Marine interrupted her.
"Who was that man?" he asked.
The nurse was startled, "Wasn't he your father," she answered.
"No, he wasn't," the Marine replied. "I never saw him before in my life."
"Then why didn't you say something when I took you to him?"
"I knew right away there had been a mistake, but I also knew he needed his son, and his son just wasn't here. When I realized that he was too sick to tell whether or not I was his son, knowing how much he needed me, I stayed."
The next time someone needs you ... just be there. Stay.
We are not human beings going through a temporary spiritual experience. We are spiritual beings going through a temporary human experience.
THIS IS WHAT WE ARE PUT ON THIS EARTH TO DO ANYWAY. RIGHT ?
HAVE A GREAT DAY AND BLESS SOMEONE ELSE IN SOME LITTLE WAY TODAY
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A Good Laugh
Oct 23, 2006 | 5:20AM
A young Nun who worked for a local home health care agency was out making her rounds when she ran out of gas.
As luck would have it, there was a gas station just one block away. She walked to the station to borrow a can with enough gas to start the car and drive to the station for a fill up.
The attendant regretfully told her that the only gas can he owned had just been loaned out, but if she would care to wait he was sure it would be back shortly.
Since the nun was on the way to see a patient, she decided not to wait and walked back to her car.
After looking through her car for something to carry to the station to fill with gas, she spotted a bedpan she was taking to the patient. Always resourceful, she carried it to the station, filled it with gasoline, and carried it back to her car.
As she was pouring the gas into the tank of her car, two men watched her from across the street. One of them turned to the other and said:
"I know that the Lord turned water into wine, but if that car starts, I'm going to church every Sunday for the rest of my life." 
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| category: Fun |
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My heroes
Sep 20, 2006 | 1:33AM
This is breathtaking. Turn on your speakers and be still...
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My friends
Mar 21, 2006 | 6:04AM
Dedicated to my constant friend, Sam
This is wonderful....enjoy.
The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail instead of his tongue.
-Anonymous
Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.
- Ann Landers
If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went.
- Will Rogers
There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face.
- Ben Williams
A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself.
- Josh Billings
The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.
- Andy Rooney
We give dogs the time we can spare, space we can spare and love we can spare. And in return, dogs give us their all. It's the best deal man has ever made.
- M. Acklam
I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.
- Rita Rudner
A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down.
- Robert Benchley
Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog.
- Franklin P. Jones
If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I have known will go to heaven, and very, very few persons.
- James Thurber
If your dog is fat, you aren't getting enough exercise.
-Unknown
My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to $3.00 a can. That's almost $21.00 in dog money.
- Joe Weinstein
Ever consider what our dogs must think of us? I mean, here we come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul -- chicken, pork, half a cow. They must think we're the greatest hunters on earth!
- Anne Tyler
Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.
- Robert A. Heinlein
If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you; that is the principal difference between a dog and a man.
- Mark Twain
You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look that says, 'Wow, you're right! I never would've thought of that!'
- Dave Barry
Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole.
- Roger Caras
If you think dogs can't count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket and then give him only two of them.
- Phil Pastoret
My goal in life is to be as good of a person as my dog already thinks I am.
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