It has come to my attention that the bad guys in movies are really horrible at their jobs. Generally when I am seeing a movie which contains a "bad guy", I will see him completely fail. He will by some means, use his many minions to capture the hero of the movie, reveal himself (for he was hiding), give an evil mischevious laugh right in the face of the hero, and say something to the effect of "I'm better than you." Throughout the movie, we have established the fact that the bad guy wants to kill the good guy REALLY bad. However, oddly enough, the bad guy decides, for some reason, that it is in his best interest to bring him back to his headquarters to kill him there. When they arrive, the villian always must talk for tons of time about why he is killing the hero, and we see the following scene:

Bad Guy: "BWAHAHAHA I've got you now! You cannot escape. Soon you will join he rest of your family that I have already killed. But wait... I do not know how I should go about murdering you. So many ways, so little lives... Shall I bite you to death, use my pistol, cut you with a knife, burn you, or make you watch Teletubbies do the same friggin thing over and over til you kill yourself? Hmmm let me ponder this in my Big Comfy Couch for an hour or two. Oh no you've killed me. Crap... that was unexpected."

Upon realization of this, I have decided to no longer see movies with "Bad Guys" in them. They are only going to remind me of watching the Disney channel when they attempt to make twelve-year old children save the world from some horrible disaster that only he/she knows about and their parents won't listen. And that, my friends... is a whole different kind of bad movie.