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A mother's love's a blessing
May 17, 2008 | 10:26AM
An Irish boy was leaving, leaving his own native home,
Crossing the broad Atlantic, once more he wished to roam;
And as he was leaving his mother, while standing on the quay,
She threw her arms around his neck and these were the words she said:
A mother's love's a blessing, no matter where you roam,
Keep her while she's living, you'll miss her when she's gone;
Love her as in childhood, though feeble, old and grey,
For you'll never miss your mother when she's buried beneath the clay.
And as the years go onward, I'll settle down in life,
I'll find a nice young Irish girl, and make her my sweet wife;
And as the kids grow older and climb around my knee,
I'll teach them the very same lesson that my mother once taught to me.
A mother's love's a blessing, no matter where you roam,
Keep her while she's living, you'll miss her when she's gone;
Love her as in childhood, though feeble, old and grey,
For you'll never miss your mother when she's buried beneath the clay.
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I BELIEVE
Apr 03, 2008 | 10:34AM
A Birth Certificate shows that we were born
A Death Certificate shows that we died
Pictures show that we lived!
Have a seat . . . Relax . . . And read this slowly.
**********************************
I believe ..... That just because two people argue, it doesn't mean they don't love each other.
And just because they don't argue,
it doesn't mean they do love each other.
I believe... That we don't have to change friends if we understand that friends change.
I believe .... That no matter how good a friend is,
they're going to hurt you every once in a while
and you must forgive them for that.
I Believe.... That true friendship continues to grow,
even over the longest distance.
Same goes for true love.
I believe .... That you can do something in an instant
that will give you heartache for life.
I believe . That it's taking me a long time to
become the person I want to be.
I believe..... That you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.
I believe .... That you can keep going long
after you think you can't.
I believe ..... That we are responsible for what we do,
no matter how we feel.
I believe .... That either you control your attitude
or it controls you.
I believe ..... That heroes are the people who do
what has to be done when it needs to be done,
regardless of the consequences.
I believe.... That money is a lousy way of keeping score.
I believe..... That my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time.
I believe..... That sometimes the people you expect
to kick you when you're down,
will be the ones to help you get back up.
I Believe....... That sometimes when I'm angry I
have the right to be angry, but that doesn't
give me the right to be cruel.
I believe..... That maturity has more to do with what
types of experiences you've had and what you've
learned from them and less to do with how
many birthdays you've celebrated.
I believe..... That it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others.
sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself.
I Believe...... That no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn't stop for your grief.
I believe...... That our background and circumstances
may have influenced who we are, but we
are responsible for who we become.
I Believe ....... That you shouldn't be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life Forever.
I believe ...... Two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.
I Believe.... That your life can be changed in a matter of
hours by people who don't even know you.
I believe...... That even when you think you have
no more to give, when a friend cries out to you -
you will find the strength to help.
I believe...... That credentials on the wall do not make
you a decent human being.
I believe ..... That the people you care about most in
life are taken from you too soon.
I Believe.... That you should send this to all
of the people that you believe in.
I just did... :)
The happiest people don't necessarily have the best of everything;
They just make the best of everything they have.
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directions
Sep 20, 2007 | 1:37AM
1. go to www.google.com2. click on "maps"
3. click on "get directions"
4. type "New York" in the first box (the "from" box)
5. type "London" in the second box (the "to" box)
6. click "Get Directions" button
7. scroll down to step #23
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COUNCIL COMPLAINTS FROM AROUND THE U.K
Sep 20, 2007 | 1:20AM
COUNCIL COMPLAINTS FROM AROUND THE U.K
These are genuine clips from council complaint
letters:
1. My bush is really overgrown round the front
and my back passage has fungus growing in it.
2. He's got this huge tool that vibrates the
whole house and I just can't take it anymore.
3. It's the dog mess that I find hard to
swallow.
4. I want some repairs done to my cooker as it
has backfired and burnt my knob off.
5. I wish to complain that my father hurt his
ankle very badly then he put his foot in the hole in his back passage.
6. And their 18 year old son is continually
banging his balls against my fence.
7. I wish to report that tiles are missing from
the outside toilet roof. I think it was bad wind the other night that
blew them off.!
8. My lavatory seat is cracked, where do I
stand?
9. I am writing on behalf of my sink, which is
coming away from the wall.
10. Will you please send someone to mend the
garden path? My wife tripped and fell on it yesterday and now she is
pregnant.
11. I request permission to remove my drawers
in the kitchen.
12. 50% of the walls are damp, 50% have
crumbling plaster and 50% are plain filthy.
13. I am still having problems with smoke in my
new drawers.
14. The toilet is blocked and we cannot bath
the children until it is cleared.
15. Will you please send a man to look at my
water, it is a funny colour and not fit to drink.
16. Our lavatory seat is broken in half and is
now in three pieces.
17. I want to complain about the farmer across
the road; every morning at 6am his cock wakes me up and its now
getting too much for me.
18. The man next door has as large erection in
the back garden, which is unsi! ghtly and dangerous.
19. Our kitchen floor is damp. We have two
children and would like a third,so please send someone round to do
something about it.
20. I am a single woman living in a downstairs
flat and would you please do something about the noise made by the man
on top of me every night.
21. Please send a man with the right tool to
finish the job and satisfy my wife.
22. I have had the clerk of works down on the
floor six times but I still have no satisfaction.
23. This is to let you know that our lavatory
seat is broke and we can't get BBC2.
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Apples and Wine
Sep 20, 2007 | 1:12AM
Apples and Wine
Women are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the
tree. Most men don't want to reach for the good ones because they
are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they sometimes take
the apples from the ground that aren't as good, but easy. The apples at
the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality, they're amazing.
They just have to wait for the right man to come along, the one who is
brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree.
Now men.......men are like a fine wine. They begin as grapes, and it's
up to women to stomp the sh*t out of them until they turn into
something acceptable to have dinner with.
Share this with all the good apples you know and the fermenting
wines in your life.
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One Flaw In Women
Aug 13, 2007 | 4:33PM
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One Flaw In Women
Women have strengths that amaze men.
They bear hardships and they carry burdens,
but they hold happiness, love and joy.
They smile when they want to scream.
They sing when they want to cry.
They cry when they are happy
and laugh when they are nervous.
They fight for what they believe in.
They stand up to injustice.
They don't take "no" for an answer
when they believe there is a better solution.
They go without, so their family can have.
They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.
They love unconditionally.
They cry when their children excel
and cheer when their friends get awards.
They are happy when they hear about
a birth or a wedding.
Their hearts break when a friend dies.
They grieve at the loss of a family member,
yet they are strong when they
think there is no strength left.
They know that a hug and a kiss
can heal a broken heart.
Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors.
They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you
to show how much they care about you.
The heart of a woman is what makes the world keep turning.
They bring joy, hope and love.
They have the compassion and ideas.
They give moral support to their
family and friends.
Women have vital things to say
and everything to give.
HOWEVER, IF THERE IS ONE FLAW IN WOMEN,
IT IS THAT THEY FORGET THEIR WORTH.
pass this along to all your women friends
and relatives to remind them just how amazing they are.
and
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Don't forget to believe in yourselves girls!
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I've been blessed indeed, The world is mine.
Jul 13, 2007 | 2:41PM
I think this is beautiful and realize how much we can be thankful for.
When I Whine
~~~~~~~
Today, upon a bus, I saw a girl with golden hair
I looked at her and sighed and wished I was as fair.
When suddenly she rose to leave,
I saw her hobble down the aisle.
She had one leg and used a crutch
But as she passed, she passed a smile.
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine
I have 2 legs, the world is mine.
~~
I stopped to buy some candy
The lad who sold it had such charm
I talked with him a while, he seemed so very glad
If I were late, it'd do no harm.
And as I left, he said to me,
"I thank you, you've been so kind.
It's nice to talk with folks like you.
You see," he said, "I'm blind."
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine.
I have 2 eyes, the world is mine.
Later while walking down the street,
I saw a child with eyes of blue
He stood and watched the others play
He did not know what to do.
I stopped a moment and then I said,
"Why don't you join the others, dear?"
He looked ahead without a word.
And then I knew, he couldn't hear.
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine.
I have 2 ears, the world is mine.
With feet to take me where I'd go.
With eyes to see the sunset's glow.
With ears to hear what I would know.
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine.
I've been blessed indeed, The world is mine.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
If this poem makes you feel like I felt,
Just forward it to all your friends,
After all, it's just a simple reminder....
We have so much to be thankful for!!!
Sorrow looks back,
Worry looks around,
Faith looks up.
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The good old days
Jun 28, 2007 | 8:40AM
Remember the
'Good old Days'
"Sit back, relax, read, & smile.
Kind of reminds you to stop & smell the roses of life,
and to give thanks to (Your) God for a Lifetime of Memories!!!!
Do You Remember?
How many do you remember?
DO YOU REMEMBER WHEN ...?
All the girls had ugly gym uniforms?
It took five minutes for the TV warm up?
Nearly everyone's Mom was at home when the kids got home from school?
It was considered a great privilege to be taken out to dinner at a real restaurant with your parents?
They threatened to keep kids back a grade if they failed. . . and they did?
When a 57 Chevy was everyone's dream car...to cruise,
peel out, lay rubber or watch submarine races, and people went steady?
No one ever asked where the car keys were
because they were always in the car,
in the ignition, and the doors were never locked?
Lying on your back in the grass with your friends
and saying things like, "That cloud looks like a "
and playing baseball with no adults to help kids with the rules of the game?
Stuff from the store came without safety caps and hermetic seals because no one had yet tried to poison a perfect stranger?
And with all our progress, don't you just wish, just once,
you could slip back in time and savor the slower pace,
and share it with the children of today?
When being sent to the principal's office was nothing
compared to the fate that awaited the student at home?
Basically we were in fear for our lives,
but it wasn't because of drive-by shootings, drugs, gangs, etc.
Our parents and grandparents were a much bigger threat!
But we survived because their love was greater than the threat.
Send this on to someone who can still remember
Nancy Drew, the Hardy boys, Laurel and Hardy,
Howdy Doody and the Peanut Gallery,
the Lone Ranger, The Shadow Knows,
Nellie Bell , Roy and Dale, Trigger and Buttermilk.
As well as summers filled with bike rides, baseball games, Hula Hoops, bowling and visits to the pool,
and eating Kool-Aid powder with sugar.
Didn't that feel good, just to go back and say, "Yeah, I remember that"?
How many of these do you remember?
Candy cigarettes
Wax Coke-shaped bottles with colored sugar water inside;
Soda pop machines that dispensed glass bottles
Coffee shops with tableside jukeboxes
Blackjack, Clove and Teaberry chewing gum
Home milk delivery in glass bottles with cardboard stoppers
Newsreels before the movie;
P.F. Fliers
Telephone numbers with a word prefix...(Raymond 4-601).
Party lines
Peashooters;
Howdy Doody
45 RPM records
Green Stamps;
Hi-Fi's
Metal ice cubes trays with levers;
Mimeograph paper;
Beanie and Cecil
Roller-skate keys;
Cork pop guns;
Drive ins
Studebakers
Washtub wringers;
The Fuller Brush Man;
Reel-To-Reel tape recorders;
Tinkertoys
Erector Sets;
The Fort Apache Play Set ;
Lincoln Logs
15 cent McDonald hamburgers
5 cent packs of baseball cards -
with that awful pink slab of bubble gum;
Penny candy;
35 cent a gallon gasoline
Jiffy Pop popcorn
Do you remember a time when...
Decisions were made by going "eeny-meeny-miney-moe"?
Mistakes were corrected by simply exclaiming, "Do Over!"?
"Race issue" meant arguing about who ran the fastest?
Catching the fireflies could happily occupy an entire evening?
It wasn't odd to have two or three "Best Friends"?
The worst thing you could catch from the opposite sex was "cooties"?
Having a weapon in school meant being caught with a slingshot?
A foot of snow was a dream come true?
Saturday morning cartoons weren't 30-minute commercials for action figures?
"Oly-oly-oxen-free" made perfect sense?
Spinning around, getting dizzy, and falling down was cause for giggles?
The worst embarrassment was being picked last for a team?
War was a card game?
Baseball cards in the spokes transformed any bike into a motorcycle?
Taking drugs meant orange-flavored chewable aspirin?
Water balloons were the ultimate weapon?
If you can remember most or all of these, then you have lived!!!!!!!
Pass this on to anyone who may need a break from
their "grown-up" life . . ..Nobody owned a purebred dog?
When a quarter was a decent allowance?
You'd reach into a muddy gutter for a penny?
Your Mom wore nylons that came in two pieces?
All your male teachers wore neckties and female teachers had
their hair done every day and wore high heels?
You got your windshield cleaned, oil checked, and gas pumped, without asking, all for free, every time?
And you didn't pay for air? And, you got trading stamps to boot?
Laundry detergent had free glasses, dishes or towels hidden inside the box?
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FUNNY IF IT WASN'T SO TRUE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jun 23, 2007 | 1:35PM
FUNNY IF IT WASN'T SO TRUE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
In the year 2006, the Lord came unto Noah, who was now living in
England and said, "Once again, the earth has become wicked and
over-populated, and I see the end of all flesh before me.
So Noah you shall build another Ark and save two of every living thing
along with a few good humans
He gave Noah the CAD drawings, saying, "You have six months to build
the Ark before I start the unending rain for 40 days and 40 nights."
Six months later, the Lord looked down and saw Noah weeping in his
yard - but no Ark.
"Noah!" He roared, "I'm about to start the rain! Where is the Ark?"
"Forgive me, Lord," begged Noah, "but things have changed. I needed
Building Regulations Approval. I've been arguing with the Fire Brigade
about the need for a sprinkler system. My neighbours claim that I should
have
obtained planning permission for building the Ark in my garden because it
is
development of the site even though in my view it is a temporary
structure.
We had to go to appeal to the Secretary of State for a decision.
Then the Department of Transport demanded a bond be posted for the
future costs of moving power lines and other overhead obstructions, to
clear
The passage for the Ark's move to the sea. I told them that the sea would
be coming to us, but they would hear nothing of it.
Getting the wood was another problem. All the decent trees have Tree
Preservation Orders on them and we live in a Site of Special
Scientific Interest set up in order to protect the spotted owl.
I tried to convince the environmentalists that I needed the wood to
save the owls - but no go!
When I started gathering the animals, the RSPCA sued me. They insisted
That I was confining wild animals against their will. They argued the
accommodation was too restrictive, and it was cruel and inhumane to
put so many animals in a confined space
Then the County Council, the Environment Agency and the Rivers
Authority ruled that I couldn't build the Ark until they'd conducted an
Environmental Impact Study on your proposed flood.
I'm still trying to resolve a complaint with the Equal Opportunities
Commission on how many BMEs I'm supposed to hire for my building team.
The Trade Unions say I can't use my sons. They insist I have to hire
only CSCS accredited workers with Ark-building experience.
To make matters worse, Customs and Excise seized all my assets,
claiming I'm trying to leave the country illegally with endangered
species.
So, forgive me, Lord, but it would take at least 10 years for me to
finish this Ark."
Suddenly the skies cleared, the sun began to shine, and a rainbow
stretched across the sky. Noah looked up in wonder and asked, "Lord - You
mean
you're not going to destroy the world?"
"Noah, I am not " said the Lord. "Your government is doing a far better job
than I ever could "
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The Obedient Wife
Jun 14, 2007 | 9:32AM
The Obedient Wife
There was a man who had worked all of his life, had saved all of his money, and was a real miser when it came to his money. Just before he died, he said to his wife, 'When I die, I want you to take all my money
and put it in the casket with me. I want to take my money to the afterlife with me.'
And so he got his wife to promise him with all of her heart that when he died, she would put all of the money in the casket with him. Well, he died.
He was stretched out in the casket, his wife was sitting there in black, and her friend was sitting next to her. When they finished the ceremony, just before the undertakers got ready to close the casket, the wife
said, 'Wait just a minute!' She had a box with her, she came over with the box and put it in the casket.
Then the undertakers locked the casket down, and they rolled it away.
So, her friend said, 'Girl, I know you weren't fool enough to put all
that money in there with your husband?'
The loyal wife replied,' Listen, I'm a Christian, I can't go back on my word. I promised him that I was going to put that money in that casket with him.'
'You mean to tell me you put that money in the casket with him!!!!?'
'I sure did,' said the wife. 'I got it all together, put it into my account and wrote him a check. If he can cash it, he can spend it.'
Send this to every clever female you know. .
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