EARLY ONE WINTER MORNING WHILE LISTENING TO THE RADIO,LEROY AND HIS WIFE CAROL HEAR THE ANNOUNCER SAY, WE ARE GOING TO HAVE 4-6 INCHES OF SNOW TODAY.YOU MUST  PARK YOUR CAR ON THE EVEN NUMBERED SIDE OF THE STREET.SO THE SNOWPLOW CAN GET THROUGH. CAROL GOES OUT AND MOVES HER CAR.

A WEEK LATER WHILE THEY ARE EATINGBREAKFAST.THE RADIO ANNOUNCER SAYS. WE ARE EXPECTING 6-8 INCHES OF SNOW TODAY. YOU MUST PARK YOUR CAR ON THE ODD NUMBERED SIDE OF THE STREET SO THE SNOWPLOW CAN GET THROUGH. CAROL GOES OUT AND MOVES HER CAR AGAIN.

THE NEXT WEEK THEY ARE HAVING BREAKFAST AGAIN.WHEN THE RADIO ANNOUNCERSAYS, WE ARE EXPECTING 8-10 INCHES OF SNOW TODAY.YOU MUST PARK... THEN THE ELECTRICITY POWER GOES OUT.

CAROL IS VERY UPSET AND WITH A WORRIED LOOK ON HER FACE SHE SAYS. HONEY I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO. WHICH SIDE OF THE STREET DO I NEED TO PARK ON.. SO THE PLOW CAN GET THROUGH?

WITH THE LOVE &UNDERSTANDING IN HIS VOICE,LIKE ALL MEN WHO ARE MARRIED TO BLONDES EXHIBIT, LEROY SAYS WHY DONT YOU JUST LEAVE IT IN THE GARAGE THIS TIME.

`v´¯) `*.¸.*´ ¸.?´¸.?*¨) ¸.?*¨) (¸.?´ (¸.?´ .?´ ¸¸.?¨¯`? _____****__________**** ______ ___***____***____***____... _*** ___ __***________****_________*... **__ _***__________**... __________***__ _***___________... ___________***_ _***_... _____HAPPY_________ ***_ __***____VALENTINE'S_____ ***_ ___***______DAY!!!!!______... _*___ ____***________... _______***_____ _____... _***___________***_______ _____... ___***_______***______... ___ __________***___*... **___________ _______... _____***

FRIENDS FOREVER AND

ALWAYS

SONJA

A HUSBAND AND WIFE WERE OUT PLAYING GOLD. THEY TEE OFF AND ONE DRIVE GOES TO THE RIGHT AND ONE DRIVE GOES TO THE LEFT.

THE WIFE FINDS HER BALL IN A PATCH OF BUTTERCUPS.SHE GRABS A CLUB AND TAKES A MIGHTY SWING AT THE BALL. SHE HITS A BEAUTIFUL SECOND SHOT,BUT IN THE PROCESS SHE HACKS THE HELL OUT OF THE BUTTERCUPS.

SUDDENLY A WOMAN APPEARS OUT OF NOWHERE. SHE BLOCKS HER PATH TO HER GOLF BAG AND LOOKS AT HER AND SAYS, IM MOTHER NATURE,AND I DONT LIKE THE WAY YOU TREATED MY BUTTERCUPS.FROM NOW ON,YOU WONT BE ABLE TO STAND THE TASTE OF BUTTER.EACH TIME YOU EAT BUTTER YOU WILL BECOME PHYSICALLY ILL TO THE POINT OF TOTAL NAUSEA.

THE MYSTER WOMAN THEN DISAPPEARS AS QUICKLY AS SHE APPEARED.

SHAKEN, THE WIFE CALLS OUT TO HER HUSBAND, HEY WHERES YOUR  BALL?

ITS OFER HERE IN THE PUSSY WILLOWS.

THE WIFE SCREAMS BACK, DONT HIT THE BALL! DONT HIT THE BALL!!!!!!

A grade school teacher in Kentucky asked her students to use the word "fascinate" in a sentence.

Molly put up her hand and said,"my family went to my granddads farm,and we saw his pet sheep it was fascinating".

Tteacger said, "That was good,but i wanted youto use the word "fascinate, not fascinating".

Sally raised her hand. She said,My family went to see Rock City and i was fascinated.

The teacher said " Well,thats good Sally, but i wanted you to use the word"fascinate,"

Little Johnny raised his hand.The teacher hesitated because she had been burned by Little Johnny before.She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word "fascinate",so she called on him.

Johnny said,"My Aunt Gina has a sweater with ten buttons, but her [censored] are so big she can only fasten eight." The teacher sat down and cried.

To My Special Friend, Sometimes in life, you find a special friend; Someone who changes your life just by being part of it. Someone who makes you laugh until you can't stop; Someone who makes you believe that there really is good in the world. Someone who convinces you that there really is an unlocked door just waiting for you to open it. This is a Forever Friendship

THANKS FOR BEING A TRUE FRIEND GRAB FRIENDS

I HAVE MOVED INTO OUR NEW HOUSE TO LET YOU KNOW

I AM BACK

SONJA

Just a little note to say I'm thinking of you today, My little way of saying, You're special in every way! (¯`v´¯) .`·.¸.·´ ¸.·... ´¸.·´¨) ¸.·*¨) (¸.·´ (¸.·´ .·´ ¸¸.·¨¯`·. -:¦:-·:*'*:·. ·:*'*:·-:¦:- -:¦:-·:*'*:·.HAVE ·:*'*:·-:¦:- -:¦:-·:*'*:·..A .·:*'*:·-:¦:- -:¦:-·:*'GREAT:*'... *:·-:¦:- -:¦:-·:*'*:·...WEEKEND... !.... :.·:*''*:·-:¦:- ... -:|:-.:*'*:. .:*''*:.-:|:- (¯`v´¯) .`·.¸.·´... ¸.·´¸.·´¨) ¸.·*¨) (¸.·´ (¸.·´ .·´ ¸¸.·¨¯`·.

HELLO EVERY ONE JUST LET YOU KNOW I AM THINKING OF YOU ALL.

SO HOPE TO TALK SOON AGAIN.

YOUR FRIEND CHK

   SONJA

A blind man walks into a lesibain bar orders a drink then hollers "hey wanna hear a blonde joke....?"the bar falls silent in a deep husky voice the woman next to him says "before you tell that joke sir i think its fair given you are blind you should know 5 things:

1.the bartender is a blonde girl

2.the bouncer is a blonde girl

3.im 6ft.220lbs blonde with a black belt in karate

4.the woman next to me is a blonde weight lifter

5.the woman to your right is a blonde wrestler

now think seriously do you really wanna tell that joke mister?"

the blind man thinks for a moment shakes his head"nah i'd just have to explain it 5 times"

 WELL HERE I GO

    I JUST HAD THE FIRST TIME EXPERENCE OF MY LIFE.I GOT TO GO TO THE CHIPNDALES FRIDAY NIGHT. BOY THAT WAS FUN,THEY WERE AWSOME, HOT, AND VERY VERY SEXY.LOL.THIS IS THE FIRST TIME I EVER GOT TO DO ANYTHING LIKE THIS,AND YES I WAS VERY SHY AT FIRST THEN I GOT INTO IT REALLY QUICK.I HAD FUN AND REALLY ENJOYED MYSELF ALSO.MY HUSBAND TOOK CARE OF THE KIDS FOR ME ALSO.SO THAT MADE IT MORE ENJOYABLE ALSO.THERES ALOT TO TELL WITH THIS.I HAD MY PICTURE TAKEN WITH THEM,THEY SIGNED MY CALENDER,AND SHIRT,AND I GOT BRAVE AND LET THEM SIGN MY CHEST.THAT WAS WEIRD.WHEN I GOT A FEW DRINKS DOWN I WAS NOT FEELING NOTHING. I GOT A HUG FROM THEM AND A KISS FROM THEM ALSO.I WAS SCREAMING LIKE A PERSON GETTING OUT OF CONTROL.LMAO I TRIED TO LET ONE OF THEM LET ME HAVE THERE HAT.HE SAID TO ME I DONT GET FAR WITHOUT MY HAT,I HAD TO TRY.IT DONT TAKE ME LONG TO GET EMBARRASSED EITHER SO WHEN I SEEN THEM MY JAW DROPPED TO THE FLOOR.IT WAS CRAZY TOO.BUT I WILL NEVER EVER FORGET THAT DAY OF JUNE17TH 2006.BUT IT WAS NICE TO GET AWAY FROM STRESS,AWAY FROM KIDS AND HUSBAND.I NEEDED THAT DAY FOR MYSELF.A FRIEND OF OURS BOUGHT MY TICKET FOR ME.SO I REALLY THANK HER FOR THAT.WELL IF BUT THIS WAS MY FIRST EXPERIENCE TO SEE THE CHIPNDALES AND I ENJOYED IT TOO.SO THE NEXT TIME  THEY ARE BACK IM GOING AGAIN. AND THIS TIME I WONT BE SO CRAZY. OH YEAH THE RIPPED THERE CLOTHES OFF AND USED THERE HATS AND HAND AND ANYTHING THEY CAN FIND TO COVER THEMSELVES UP NOW THAT WAS A TRIP.LMAO.THEY WENT AND DANCE WITH YOU.NOW THAT WAS EVEN BETTER.YEE HAW NOW.. THEY DID SOME COOL STUFF ALSO.SO THAT WAS MY FIRST EXPERIENCE OF THE CHIPNDALES.A DAY I WILL NEVER FORGET.

YOUR FRIEND SONJA

                                       FOILED ROBBERY

A BLONDE AND A BRUNETTE DECIDED TO ROB A BANK.THEY QUICKLY DEVISED A GOOD PLAN AND THEY PUT IT INTO ACTION.THE BRUNETTE DROVE UPTO THE FRONT OF THE BANK THAT THEY DECIDED TO ROB.SHE TURNED TO THE BLONDE AND ASKED HER,"NOW.;DO YOU REMEMBER WHAT THE PLAN IS?"TE BLONDE SIGHED AND REPLIED,"YEAH,YEAH,I REMEMBER...."THE BRUNETTE WENT OVER THE PLAN ONCE MOREAND LET THE BLONDE OUT TO DO HER STUFF.BEFORE THE BLONDE CLULD SHE THE DOOR.THE BRUNETTE YELLED OUT,BE SURE TO BE IN AND OUT IN NO MORE THATN 5 MINUTES.

THE BLONDE RAN INSIDE AND THE BRUNETTE WAITED IN THE CAR...AND WAITED ...AND WAITED...AND WAITED.AFTER WAITING FOR SO LONG IN THE CAR,THE BLONDE BURSTS OUT OF THE BANKS DOORS, THE ALARMBLARING LOUD ENOUGH TO WAKE EVERYONE UP. THE BLONDE WAS LUGGING A BANK SAFE BEHIND HER BY A ROPE TIED AROUND IT. A SECURITY GUARD RAN OUT OF THE BANK, WITH HIS PANTS SOWN AROUND HIS ANKLES AND ATTEMPTING TO REACH FOR HIS HUN. THE BLONDE BREATHED HEAVILY AS SHE TRIED TO PUT THE SAFE IN THE CAR BUT FINALLY GAVE UP AND SROPPED THE SAFE BEHIND. SHE RAN INTO THE PASSENGER SEAT AND PULLED THE DOOR SHUT,THE CAR ALREADY MOVING.THE SECURITY GUARD YELLED., STOP!STOP! WHILE THE PAIR DROVE OFF,LEAVING THE SAFE WITH ROPE TIED TIGHTLY AROUND IT BEHIND.

THE BRUNETTE FRANTICALLY ASKED THE BLONDE,WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED IN THERE?!?" THE BLONDE WAS PANTING AND TURNED TO THE BRUNETTE ANSD CHOKED OUT, " WHAT DO YOU MEAN? I FOLLOWED THE PLAN EXACTLY!" THE BRUNETTE PAUSED AND YELLED.  "YOU IDIOT!YOUR WERE SUPPOSED TO TIE UP THE GUARD AND BLOW THE SAFE"!

HERE IS ONE THAT WILL MAKE YOU LAUGH ENJOY

SONJA