Joining the list of people who are moving in onto GRAB Way....

Based on the drawing and the 10 answers they gave this is a summary of their personality:
Your house tells the world that you ought to be a leader. You are good at making friends and when the joyful moment arrives, you make the most out of it. You are shy and reserved. If you've drawn a cross on each of windows, you always want to live alone. Once you have a problem, you need a friend with you. Your life is always full of changes.

When it comes to love, you shut yourself off. It's difficult to win your heart because you have decided to keep your feelings deep inside. You have a strong personality and you like to command, influence and control people.

You are not a romantic person by nature. It also safe to say that others don't see you as a flirt. You don't think much about yourself.

Chase is home on a 72 hour TCA (home visit). I picked him up yesterday evening and he will have to go back mid-day on Friday. So far, he's doing quite well, just a touch restless.

Conlan decided to wake everyone up again at yet one more unGodly hour. That seems to be his forte. He gets up incredibly early and decides he'd like company. Eventually, within 20 minutes of his eyes opening, the entire house is awake and cranky as hell. I have to find SOMETHING to get this kid to stay in his bed if he's going to wake up so early all the time. He never was a good one for sleeping. Even as a baby and young toddler there were sleep issues.

Chandler is LOVING school and looks forward every morning that he's able to get on the van and attend. And every afternoon he sits on the floor beside me and we do his homework together. He's pretty smart, but gives up fairly easily. Guess that's a simple male genetic marker. Can't argue with genetics, just try to overcome it.

Casey is actually making the grade in school yet again. Not that he has much choice about it, being in the leader program still. They pick him up directly after school where he does homework then he does the PT and whatever other classes, courses, pee tests, etc. they have scheduled for the day. He doesn't usually arrive home until between 8 and 8:30 at night.

Cian is hitting the 'terrible twos' hard and heavy, with a little extra teachings from his dear older brothers. He knows how to get into so much more than he should and for once I curse his intelligent little brain for picking up things so easily. However he's still able to cute his way out of most consequences, though a smack on the hand is usually sufficient punishment to help him understand that we DO NOT "_______" (whatever it is he does at the time to earn such a smack).

Caleb is well into learning his ABCs and 123s. He's catching on slowly but surely and I'm the one at a disadvantage, him being left handed and me not being left handed. Makes it a little more interesting on how to teach him to write his letters and numbers. But we're making it through. He should be completely ready for Kgarten next school year.

Me? I'm not really wanting to talk about me so much. I've had to make some difficult choices in my personal life that I'm not happy about, but it has become obvious to me that some things will not change. And there is only so much I can do to help get things rolling. I cannot fight for some things that don't want to be fought for, it's a rather futile effort. And banging my head against a brick wall might feel good at first, challenging even, but then after a few months it starts to hurt. So .... I'm dealing with yet another loss, another failure and trying to just get from one day to the next without breaking down and losing it. Having learned my lesson from experiences past, I know I will get through this. I just wish I understood why this time it's so much harder than all the other times I've failed in my life.

So that's the update on the Onder family. For whoever might read this silly blog and possibly even give a [censored].

Have a great day.

Copying from my friend Julie who copies from others .......... lol

http://kevan.org/johari?name=heart_reavor

http://kevan.org/nohari?name=heart_reavor

Again if you want to hear the music you'll need to click the play button. 

 

For those with delicate sensibilities, I've opted for non-autoplay.  If you want to hear the music you'll have to click the "play" button.

 

Who thinks up this stuff?

My horoscope for today....one reason I try not to put too much faith into these silly things.

Virgo: You may be tired from a busy week and are not inspired to burn up the road in your usual efficient manner. You may even feel lazy today and could try to rationalize your self-indulgences as being well earned. Relax; you really don't need to justify to yourself or others that you want time to enjoy your dreams. There is more to life than just doing chores.

I've had a lot of extra time on my hands lately. Or should I say I have had a lot of time lately to do some deep thinking. Not that I really wanted to, but it happens naturally. Usually deep in the night when I'm unable to sleep.

And I've thought about my life. I thought about how I've become who I am today. I thought about the events that have molded and transformed me, shaped my life. Like a river that cuts through the land, the events in my life have molded me into who I am. Though I'm sure there was a nugget of personality here and there that helped, I believe it's the events that we live through that have the most impact on who we grow into.

Having been asked (many times) previously if I had the chance to do over certain things in my life, certain decisions, I would have to say a heartfelt NO, because changing that one little thing, whether it was a good thing or bad thing, could have a huge impact on who I am today. Where I am today. And I'm fairly comfortable with both of those. I could wish for more. I could wish for a couple of things. But in the big picture, I have my boys. I have my home. I have a firm faith in God. I have my family. I have my health.

I'm not necessarily a gambler. I have to admit to being a bit cautious about change. However something I am learning is that there are times that lifes greatest rewards are in taking risks, chances. Sometimes you'll get just what you were hoping for. And sometimes, you'll get more than you ever dreamed of.

The journey in life is not always about getting to the end. Often the destination is lifes' journey alone. Where you are meant to be. And where your life truly begins.

You Are a Blue Flower

A blue flower tends to represent peace, openness, and balance. At times, you are very delicate like a cornflower. And at other times, you are wise like an iris. And more than you wish, you're a little cold, like a blue hydrangea.

Your Brain is 60% Female, 40% Male

Your brain is a healthy mix of male and female You are both sensitive and savvy Rational and reasonable, you tend to keep level headed But you also tend to wear your heart on your sleeve

Your Bumper Sticker Should Be

Give me ambiguity - or give me something else

 

You Are The Star

You represent the ultimate in truth and purity. Insightful and illuminating, you provide guidance for others. You also demonstrate unselfish, unconditional love. You posses many spiritual gifts, including the ability to heal. Your fortune: Your future is looking brighter by the day. The near future will be a time of both hope and healing. Luck is about to come your way, perhaps the best luck you have ever seen. Life is about to get a lot easier and much better!

Your Linguistic Profile:

50% General American English

20% Yankee

15% Dixie

10% Upper Midwestern

0% Midwestern

You Are A Pine Tree

You love agreeable company, peace, and harmony. Compassionate and friendly, you love to help others. A natural poet, you have a very active imagination. You are very soft on the inside - needing affection and reassurance. You can fall in love deeply, but you will leave if you feel betrayed.

Your Love Number is 6

Who you fall in love with is all about who you trust. Loyalty is important to you, and you want the most faithful of lovers. In return, you never let your heart or eyes wander. Open and honest, your relationships tend to be free of secrets.

You Are a Fortune Cookie

You're a rather normal person, except that you have extraordinary luck in life. People want to be around you (even when they're a little sick of you), in hopes of being lucky too!

I could use some of these.........

 

And not doing too bad all things considered.

My mother and sister came here Monday evening of last week to help out.  A lot got accomplished, the kitchen painted, the living room almost painted, my DRYER got fixed!!

They left last night to go home, which is in NJ.  I have a small area in the kitchen to finish painting, about 1/4 of the living room to paint, and then the rest of the painting that I had started upstairs, which is basically an entire room.

My van, thankfully is not totalled.  I should have it back by Monday or Tuesday of this coming week.

Otherwise, I'm okay.  The boys and I are getting back into our routine or actually an even better one, since I've made a few changes in the way things go around here.  I wasn't able to post anything in my blog all week mainly because I was forever running hither and yon this whole week while my sister stayed here and painted and watched whatever boys I didn't take with me.

Things are okay in my world.  They aren't quite what I wanted in previous months, but everything is okay.  I can handle "okay".

The van was towed this morning to the body shop.

I called the insurance company to let them know, they'll send out the appraiser (sp?) to write the estimate.  I can only hope that it's not considered totalled out.  I will then be without transportation.

I know for a fact the radiator is gone.  The passenger tire is useless, with *I can't think of the right word* wires showing through the tread.  I don't know what else they'll find when they get under the hood.

Here are the pics.

 

 

 

 

First off, things are okay between Cheyne and I.

My face is not so lucky, hopefully he'll still love me after he sees them.  NO he did NOT do this to me.

An accident in my van did.  Those pictures will follow, but I can only sit for just so long at the computer right now without a major headache.

 

I know this is NOT the greatest picture of me, but considering the circumstances.......

 

 

 

 

It's over.  The choices have been made.  The dreams, the plans, the future .... shattered by one decision.  I won't say it was an easy one for I'm sure it wasn't.  The results remain the same.

It's over.  I don't have any regrets for loving him.  I don't have any regrets for being his friend.

But I can't do this anymore.  It's over.  Inside, I'm dead.  And I don't ever want to wake up.

It hurts to damned much to breathe.

I won't be around for a bit.  Don't worry about me.  You know I'll be fine.  I always am.

Right?