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On National HIV Testing Day, Remember This Rule to Avoid It: No Test, No Touch
Jun 27, 2007 | 3:38PM
He was Prince Charming. Tall, handsome, a real “honey-dip.” He swept her off her feet. He was flowers, expensive dinners -- even a dedication on the radio -- and attentive. He proposed within five months. Six months later, they were wed. It was supposed to be bliss Two years later, however, LaJoyce Brookshire discovered her husband had a big secret. He had AIDS. Full-blown AIDS. He knew it when he married her and never breathed a word. Back in the late 1980s and early ‘90s, many people still believed AIDS was a gay white man’s disease. Brookshire said her husband was clear that he had slept around -- with women. He was so stridently homophobic that it never occurred to her to get tested for HIV/AIDS or to ask her husband if he had been. In hindsight, she says, she should have told him what she advises sisters to say when they think they’ve found Mr. Right: “No test. No touch.” The author of the novels “Soul Food” and “Web of Deception” has penned “Faith Under Fire: Betrayed by a Thing Called Love,” which chronicles her triumph after discovering her husband had hidden the truth about his illness from her. Brookshire, who also is an ordained minister, told BlackAmericaWeb.Com that her story is one that can happen to any woman, even a woman of faith who believes she is more focused and careful about her relationships. “When I saw that tall, fine honey-dip, it all went out the window,” Brookshire said, adding that her story was like that of many women who threw caution to the wind in their haste to get married, ignoring the warning signs that Mr. Right wasn’t exactly. Brookshire said God protected her. Her tests for HIV/AIDS came back negative after a nearly month-long wait for the test results. And, she said, she never doubted the outcome. “I truly felt the peace of God during that time,” Brookshire said. “In 1992, you had to wait weeks and weeks and weeks for results … It was no way it was anything but God.” She doesn’t advise women to go into their relationships as blindly, however. Brookshire joins clergy, health professionals and other witnesses to the AIDS epidemic in encouraging people today, National HIV Testing Day, to get HIV counseling and testing. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention estimates that 180,000 to 280,000 people nationwide are HIV-positive but are unaware of their status. Organizers around the country have distributed information about HIV/AIDS, testing sites and have targeted black and Latino populations, which are most at risk of contracting the virus. NHTD is an annual campaign launched 10 years ago by the National Association of People with AIDS, the oldest coalition of people living with HIV/AIDS, to encourage at-risk individuals to get counseling and be tested. The organization distributes testing day campaign materials to community groups and health centers. Women should consider being tested periodically, too (every three to six months if you’re not in an exclusive relationship), and insist that their partners do the same. Just because you’re married or in a steady relationship doesn’t mean your mate isn’t having outside activity or that a virus isn’t dormant. “In this day and age, you should not have a partner who is not tested,” Brookshire said. “Be safe, not just by using condoms, but be safe by collecting information. You want a health report, just like you want a financial report. How does he treat his Mama?" “The weakness of the flesh is that we’re ready to get involved, and we don’t really know these men. What’s his favorite color? Does he like ice cream?” Brookshire said. When her husband was initially diagnosed, he told Brookshire he didn’t know how he picked up the virus. She assumed he had contracted the disease from promiscuous, heterosexual sex. “One of the reasons why was he took a lot of care during our relationship” to point out women he had been involved with in the past. “He always made an incredible display to me of his machoism.” When he was diagnosed, she said, “I thought, ‘Oh my gosh! This is a direct result of promiscuous behavior.’ I was so enamored with that man that I was looking the other way when things were punching me in the face.” Looking back, Brookshire said, her husband’s over-the-top homophobia, which led him to forbid her gay friends from visiting their home, his reckless spending as if there were no tomorrow, his rush to woo and wed her, and a preoccupation with death and guns and other erratic behavior all were signs that something was amiss. After his diagnosis, Brookshire became her husband’s caretaker, tending to him until his death in 1995. She thought she had forgiven him, until just weeks before his death, when she finally learned he had cheated with men. She said she suppressed her anger and the urge to kill. “I almost checked him out myself, I ain’t gonna lie,” Brookshire said. “I did consider killing him twice.” Instead, she said, she remembered God’s pledge to care for those who do good. Ultimately, she wrote her book and has been speaking out on the issue of HIV/AIDS testing. “God has given me this testimony as an assignment. It’s going to help other people be set free,” Brookshire said. Brookshire’s testimony struck a familiar chord with Pernessa Seele, founder of The Balm In Gilead, a nonprofit organization based in Richmond, Virginia that trains church leaders to develop AIDS ministries to serve their congregations and communities. Seele, who founded The Balm in Gilead 18 years ago, said a few months ago, she met a man “I was really excited about. He was not anyone I would normally have been excited about, and he was not anyone my family would have been excited about my bringing home. But there was a certain energy there.” Instead of pursuing a relationship, however, Seele told BlackAmericaWeb.com, “I stepped back and began to think about the things he told me. He had been homeless; he had been this, that, that and that.” It was enough to make her back off, but she knows that many women still ignore the red flags. “You are looking for someone, and you start thinking maybe we’re not going to get the black prince on the shining horse” and you settle for less than you want because you start thinking this might be the best chance you’re going to get for love, Seele said. “You think you’d 'better get a man.' That feeds into why our numbers are off the charts." According to figures from the Centers for Disease Control and the Harvard AIDS Institute, more than 50 percent of the estimated 40,000 new HIV infections each year occur among black Americans. AIDS is the No. 1 cause of death among black adults ages 25 to 44, before heart disease, cancer and homicide. One in 50 black men is HIV-positive. One in 160 Black women is infected. Black senior citizens represent more than 50 percent of HIV cases among persons over the age of 55. Intravenous drug use accounts for 43 percent of infections among black women and 38 percent among black men. Further, many women contract HIV infection through sex with an intravenous drug user. Black children represent almost two-thirds of reported pediatric AIDS cases. The Balm in Gilead has spent the month of June encouraging churches to get their members tested, either by bringing in health care professionals to conduct testing on the premises or to direct congregants to testing sites. Seele said she is also encouraging women to “take a deep breath, put your professional cap on, and deal with life for yourself like you do for other people. We can always see what our girlfriends should be doing with their relationships. Ask yourself, ‘Is he a real match for me? Am I better off with him or better off staying single? Is he the type who is going to use condoms and not abuse me?’” Churches can help, she said, by bringing in AIDS educators and health practitioners to speak to their congregations, opening dialogues with their men’s groups and by ministers speaking out from the pulpit about the health crisis that HIV/AIDS has become in the black community.” People are more open to getting the facts about AIDS than they were even five years ago, Seele said. Last Sunday, she said, her pastor told the congregation that women must be empowered to question men about their sexual activities and men must be empowered to answer honestly. “He said, ‘There is no such thing as the down low. You’re gay, bisexual or straight. If you’re gay, be gay,’” Seele said. “He wasn’t saying it’s wrong. He said be truthful.” “It was well received,” Seele said. “When he said it five years ago, it was greeted by silence.” At a recent testing at a church in Harlem, 14 people were tested and five of them were HIV-positive. “These 14 people would not have gotten tested if it had not been in the church,” Seele said. Seele said the statistics in Harlem are alarming, with one in seven black men there infected with HIV/AIDS Last week, at another New York church, a 97-year-old woman who took the test was found to be HIV-positive, Seele said. “We have to begin dealing with the reality of people’s sexual lives past 50. We have to begin to talk to our mothers and grandmothers because it’s a real-life issue,” Seele said. “Some of them think if they’re too old to have children, they can’t contract the virus. In some communities, their numbers are higher than in our teen communities.” Seele also said there should be greater emphasis in getting the word out about HIV/AIDS in rural communities “In urban centers people may not know, but the information is available,” Seele said. In communities that are poorer and more isolated, getting the facts to them as a part of routine health care is more difficult. “We’re helping churches in Washington, D.C. add an HIV/AIDS ministry. They have ministries for obesity, hypertension and diabetes. They need an HIV/AIDS ministry. It’s not a sex issue, it’s a health issue,” the Rev. Susan Newman, director of the Balm in Gilead’s Washington, D.C. office, told BlackAmericaWeb.com. Newman said her office also works with the Congressional Black Caucus and legislative bodies that address health policy issues involving HIV/AIDS. “We work with advocates for policy as well as treatment and care with the political leadership and the clergy.” The issue for many churches, she said, isn’t whether to encourage testing, but how to go about it. Churches can set up testing on site or direct their members to places that conduct such tests or hold seminars that explain the HIV/AIDS crisis and what steps people can take to protect their health. “A lot of times people don’t want to be tested at their church,” Newman said. They will go elsewhere or to churches that host health fairs, which test for a variety of illnesses. That way, people don’t know whether you’re being screened for hypertension, diabetes or HIV.” National HIV Testing Day, she said, “is a day to note that this month has been HIV Testing Month. Just like brushing your teeth, it’s something you ought to do." “If you’re negative, hallelujah, and let’s start looking at ways you can continue to be negative and practice low risk behavior,” Newman said. “If you’re positive, let’s get you into treatment and care. There are low-cost options. It’s not about a 40-pill cocktail a day. There’s one pill that combines three medications that you can take.” “We're just asking churches to continue lighting the way for HIV testing,” Seele said. “It’s not about gay or straight. It’s about the family.”
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Missing You From Lorna
Jun 27, 2007 | 11:27AM
 Hello everyone and all of my friends here in grab. This blog is from Lorna. Everyone know's Lorna here in grab, This is to inform you all that her computer burn up. And she want everyone to know that she love you and miss you all very much. And she will be back in just as soon as she can purchase another computer. It might be a while. But she said to tell everyone to be Patience with her. She will be back soon. And to remain blessed.... 
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Have Faith
Dec 04, 2006 | 4:53PM
Remember - there's always hope! Always believe in MIRACLES!! Three years ago, a little boy and his grandmother came to see Santa at Mayfair Mall in Wisconsin. The child climbed up on his lap, holding a picture of a little girl. "Who is this?" asked Santa, smiling. "Your friend? Your sister?" "Yes, Santa," he replied. "My sister, Sarah, who is very sick," he said sadly. Santa glanced over at the grandmother who was waiting nearby, and saw her dabbing her eyes with a tissue. "She wanted to come with me to see you, oh, so very much, Santa!" the child exclaimed. "She misses you," he added softly. Santa tried to be cheerful and encouraged a smile to the boy's face, asking him what he wanted Santa to bring him for Christmas. When they finished their visit, the Grandmother came over to help the child off his lap, and started to say something to Santa, but halted. "What is it?" Santa asked warmly. "Well, I know it's really too much to ask you, Santa, but .." the old woman began, shooing her grandson over to one of Santa's elves to collect the little gift which Santa gave all his young visitors. "The girl in the photograph... my granddaughter well, you see. she has leukemia and isn't expected to make it even through the holidays," she said through tear-filled eyes. "Is there any way, Santa any possible way that you could come see Sarah? That's all she's asked for, for Christmas, is to see Santa." Santa blinked and swallowed hard and told the woman to leave information with his elves as to where Sarah was, and he would see what he could do. Santa thought of little else the rest of that afternoon. He knew what he had to do. "What if it were MY child lying in that hospital bed, dying," he thought with a sinking heart, "this is the least I can do." When Santa finished visiting with all the boys and girls that evening, he retrieved from his helper the name of the hospital where Sarah was staying. He asked the assistant location manager how to get to Children's Hospital. "Why?" Rick asked, with a puzzled look on his face. Santa relayed to him the conversation with Sarah's grandmother earlier that day. "C'mon.... I'll take you there," Rick said softly. Rick drove them to the hospital and came inside with Santa. They found out which room Sarah was in. A pale Rick said he would wait out in the hall. Santa quietly peeked into the room through the half-closed door and saw little Sarah on the bed. The room was full of what appeared to be her family; there was the Grandmother and the girl's brother he had met earlier that day. A woman whom he guessed was Sarah's mother stood by the bed, gently pushing Sarah's thin hair off her forehead. And another woman who he discovered later was Sarah's aunt, sat in a chair near the bed with weary, sad look on her face. They were talking quietly, and Santa could sense the warmth and closeness of the family, and their love and concern for Sarah. Taking a deep breath, and forcing a smile on his face, Santa entered the room, bellowing a hearty, "Ho, ho, ho!" "Santa!" shrieked little Sarah weakly, as she tried to escape her bed her bed to run to him, IV tubes in tact. Santa rushed to her side and gave her a warm hug.A child the tender age of his own son -- 9 years old -- gazed up at him with wonder and excitement. Her skin was pale and her short tresses bore telltale bald patches from the effects of chemotherapy. But all he saw when he looked at her was a pair of huge, blue eyes. His heart melted, and he had to force himself to choke back tears. Though his eyes were riveted upon Sarah's face, he could hear the gasps and quiet sobbing of the women in the room. As he and Sarah began talking, the family crept quietly to the bedside one by one, squeezing Santa's shoulder or his hand gratefully,whispering "thank you" as they gazed sincerely at him with shining eyes. Santa and Sarah talked and talked, and she told him excitedly all the toys she wanted for Christmas, assuring him she'd been a very good girl that year. As their time together dwindled, Santa felt led in his spirit to pray for Sarah, and asked for permission from the girl's mother. She nodded in agreement and the entire family circled around Sarah's bed, holding hands. Santa looked intensely at Sarah and asked her if she believed in angels.
"Oh, yes, Santa... I do!" she exclaimed. "Well, I'm going to ask that angels watch over you, "he said. Laying one hand on the child's head , Santa closed his eyes and prayed. He asked that God touch little Sarah, and heal her body from this disease. He asked that angels minister to her, watch and keep her.And when hefinished praying, still with eyes closed,he started singing softly, "Silent Night, Holy Night.... all is calm, all is bright." The family joined in, still holding hands, smiling at Sarah, and crying tears of hope, tears of joy for this moment,as Sarah beamed at them all. When the song ended,Santa sat on the side of the bed again and held Sarah's 
frail, small hands in his own . "Now, Sarah, "he said authoritatively, "you have a job to do, and that is to concentrate on getting well. I want you to have fun playing with your friends this summer, and I expect to see you at my house at Mayfair Mall this time next year!" He knew it was risky proclaiming that, to this little girl who had terminal cancer, but he "had" to. He had togive her the greatest gift he could -- not dolls or games or toys --but the gift of HOPE.
"Yes, Santa! "Sarah exclaimed, her eyes bring.He leaned down and kissed her on the forehead and left the room. Out in the hall, the minute Santa's eyes met Rick's, a look passed between them and they wept unashamed. Sarah's mother and grandmother slipped out of the room quickly and rushed to Santa's side to thank him. "My only child is the same age as Sarah,& quot; he explained quietly. "This is the least I could do." They nodded with understanding and hugged him. One year later, Santa Mark was again back on the set in Milwaukee for his six-week, seasonal job which he so loves to do. Several weeks went by and then one day a child came up to sit on his lap. "Hi, Santa! Remember me?!" "Of course, I do," Santa proclaimed (as he always does), smiling down at her. After all, the secret to being a "good" Santa is to always make each child feel as if they are the "only" child in the world at that moment. "You came to see me in the hospital last year!" Santa's jaw dropped. Tears immediately sprang in his eyes, and he grabbed this littlemiracle and held her to his chest. "Sarah!" he exclaimed. He scarcelyrecognized her, for her hair was long and silky and her cheeks wererosy -- much different from the little girl he had visited just a year before. He looked over and saw Sarah's mother and grandmother in the sidelines smiling and waving and wiping their eyes. That was the best Christmas ever for Santa Claus. He had witnessed--and been blessed to be instrumental in bringing about -- this miracle of hope. This precious little child was healed. Cancer-free. Alive and well. He silently looked up to Heaven and humbly whispered, "Thank you, Father.'Tis a very, Merry Christmas! 
 MATHEW 21-22
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For A Very Special Friend On Your Birthday
Oct 11, 2006 | 9:15PM
It is your birthday And on this day I want you to know that You are a very Special person Who has touched and warmed Many lives Including mine I also want you to know How much I appreciate you Have a very happy birthday!
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Jesus Will Take Care Of You
Aug 28, 2006 | 9:06AM
One night a man had a dream. He dreamed he was walking along the beach with the Lord. Across the sky flashed scenes from his life. For each scene, he noticed two sets of footprints in the sand, one belonging to him and the other to the Lord When the last scene of his life flashes before him,he looked back at the footprints in the sand. He noticed that many times along the path of his life there was only one set of footprints. He also noticed that it happened at the very lowest and saddest times in his life. This really botheres him and he questioned the Lord about it, "Lord, you said that once I decided to follow you, you'd walk with me all the way. But I have noticed that during the most troublesome times in my life,there is only one set of footprints. I don't understand why when I needed you most you would leave me." The Lord replied," My Precious, precious child. I love you and I would never leave you. During your times of trial and suffering, when you see only one set of footprints,It was then that I carried you. So what I'm trying to tell you is that when you have tryed everything else ..... Try Jesus ! 
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God's Cake
Jul 25, 2006 | 11:16AM
Sometimes we wonder, "What did I do to deserve this?" or "Why did God have to do this to me?" Here is a wonderful explanation! A daughter is telling her Mother how everything is going wrong, she's failing algebra, her boyfriend broke up with her and her best friend is moving away. Meanwhile, her Mother is baking a cake and asks her daughter if she would like a snack, and the daughter says, "Absolutely Mom, I love your cake." "Here, have some cooking oil," her Mother offers. "Yuck" says her daughter. "How about a couple raw eggs?" "Gross, Mom!" "Would you like some flour then? Or maybe baking soda?" "Mom, those are all yucky!" To which the mother replies: "Yes, all those things seem bad all by themselves. But when they are put together in the right way, they make a wonderfully delicious cake! God works the same way. Many times we wonder why He would let us go through such bad and difficult times. But God knows that when He puts these things all in His order, they always work for good! We just have to trust Him and, eventually, they will all make something wonderful! God is crazy about you. He sends you flowers every spring and a sunrise every morning. Whenever you want to talk, He'll listen. He can live anywhere in the universe, and He chose your heart. If you like this, send this on to the people you really care about. I did. 
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Interview With Rick Warren
Jul 06, 2006 | 5:31PM
In the interview by Paul Bradshaw with Rick Warren, Rick said: People ask me, What is the purpose of life? And I respond: In a nutshell, life is preparation for eternity. We were made to last forever, and God wants us to be with Him in Heaven One day my heart is going to stop, and that will be the end of my body--but not the end of me. I may live 60 to 100 years on earth, but I am going to spend trillions years in eternity. This is the warm-up act - the dress rehearsal of God wants us to practice on earth what we will do forever in eternity. We were made by God and for God, and until you figure that out, life isn't going to make sense. Life is a series of problems: Either you are in one now, you're just coming out of one, or you're getting ready to go into another one. The reason for this is that God is more interested in your character than your comfort. God is more interested in making your life holy than He is in makingyour life happy. We can be reasonably happy here on earth, but that's not the goal of life.The goal is to grow in character, in Christ likeness. This past year has been the greatest year of my life but also the toughest, with my wife, Kay, getting cancer. I used to think that life was hills and valleys - you go through a dark time, then you go to the mountaintop, back and forth. I don't believe that anymore. Rather than life being hills and valleys, I believe that it's kind of like two rails on a railroad track, and at all times you have something good and something bad in your life. No matter how good things are in your life, there is always something bad that needs to be worked on. And no matter how bad things are in your life, there is always something good for which you can thank God. You can focus on your purposes, or you can focus on your problems. If you focus on your problems, you're going into self-centeredness, "which is my problem, my issues, my pain." But one of the easiest ways to get rid of pain is to get your focus off yourself and onto God and others. We discovered quickly that in spite of the prayers of hundreds of thousands of people, God was not going to heal Kay or make it easy for her It has been very difficult for her, and yet God has strengthened her character, given her a ministry of helping other people, given her a testimony, drawn her closer to Him and to people You have to learn to deal with both the good and the bad of life. Actually, sometimes learning to deal with the good is harder For instance, this past year, all of a sudden, when the book sold 15 million copies, it made me instantly very wealthy. It also brought a lot of notoriety that I had never had to deal with before. I don't think God gives you money or notoriety for your own ego or for you to live a life of ease. So I began to ask God what He wanted me to do with this money, notoriety and influence. He gave me two different passages that helped me decide what to do, II Corinthians 9 and Psalm 72. First, in spite of all the money coming in, we would not change our lifestyle one bit. We made no major purchases. Second, about midway through last year, I stopped taking a salary from the church. Third, we set up foundations to fund an initiative we call The Peace Plan to plant churches, equip leaders, assist the poor, care for the sick, and educate the next generation. Fourth, I added up all that the church had paid me in the 24 years since I started the church, and I gave it all back.It was liberating to be able to serve God for free We need to ask ourselves: Am I going to live for possessions? Popularity? Am I going to be driven by pressures? Guilt? Bitterness? Materialism? Or am I going to be driven by God's purposes (for my life)? When I get up in the morning, I sit on the side of my bed and say, God, if I don't get anything else done today, I want to know You more and love You better. God didn't put me on earth just to fulfill a to-do list. He's more interested in what I am than what I do. That's why we're called human beings, not human doings. Happy moments, PRAISE GOD. Difficult moments, SEEK GOD. Quiet moments, WORSHIP GOD. Painful moments, TRUST GOD. Every moment, THANK GOD. 
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A Man's Wish
Jul 04, 2006 | 10:26AM
A man was sick and tired of going to work every day while his wife stayed home.
He wanted her to see what he went through so he prayed:
"Dear Lord: I go to work every day and put in 8 hours while my wife merely stays at home.
I want her to know what I go through, so please
allow her body to switch with mine for a day. Amen.
God, in his infinite wisdom, granted the man's wish.
The next morning, sure enough, the man awoke as a woman.
He arose, cooked breakfast for his mate, awakened the kids, set out their school clothes, fed them breakfast, packed their lunches, drove them to school, came home and picked up the dry cleaning, took it to the cleaners and stopped at the bank to make a deposit, went grocery shopping, then drove home to put away the groceries, paid the bills and balanced the checkbook. He cleaned the cat's litter box and bathed the dog. Then it was already 1 P.M. and he hurried to make the beds, do the laundry, vacuum, dust, and sweep and mop the kitchen floor.
Ran to the school to pick up the kids and got into an argument with them on the way home.
Set out milk and cookies and got the kids organized to do their homework, then set up the ironing board and watched TV while he did the ironing.
At 4:30 he began peeling potatoes and washing vegetables for salad, breaded the pork chops and snapped fresh beans for supper.
After supper, he cleaned the kitchen, ran the dishwasher, folded laundry, bathed the kids, and put them to bed.
.At 9 P.M.! he was exhausted and, though his daily chores weren't finished, he went to bed where he was expected to make love, which he managed to get through without complaint.
The next morning, he awoke and immediately knelt by the bed and said: Lord, I don't know what I was thinking. I was so wrong to envy my wife's being able to stay home all day. Please, oh please, let us trade back."
The Lord, in his infinite wisdom, replied: "My son, I feel you have learned your lesson and I will be happy to change things back to the way they were."
You'll just have to wait nine months, though. You got pregnant last night."
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What Makes A Dad
Jun 08, 2006 | 4:43PM
God took the strength of a mountain, The majesty of a tree, The warmth of a summer sun, The calm of a quiet sea, The generous soul of nature, The comforting arm of night, The wisdom of the ages, The power of the eagle's flight, The joy of a morning in spring, The faith of a mustard seed, The patience of eternity, The depth of a family need, Then God combined these qualities, When there was nothing more to add, He knew His masterpiece was complete, And so, He called it... Dad .
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History Of Father's Day !
Jun 08, 2006 | 4:38PM
The history of Father's Day is very interesting. The thought for creating a day for children to honor their fathers began in Spokane, Washington. The idea of having the Father's Day came to the mind of Sonora Smart while listening to a Mother's Day sermon in 1909. After the death of her mother, she along with her siblings was raised by her father, William Jackson Smart. Sonora wanted to tell her father how special he was. Sonora's father was born in June, so she chose to hold the first Father's Day celebration in Spokane, Washington on the 19th ofJune, 1910. The National Father's Day Committee was formed in New York City in 1926. A Joint Resolution of Congress recognized the Father's day in 1956 and in 1966 President Richard Nixon established a permanent national observance of Father's Day to be held on the third Sunday of June. Thus, the Father's Day was born in memory and appreciation by a daughter who believed that her father and all other fathers should be honored with a special day. 
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