This really made me laugh. They're all so true and I'd never really thought about it before. Read on and prepare to be amused!!!

1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time. I know where my watch is pal, where is yours? Do I point at my bum when I ask where the toilet is?

2. People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the tv remote because they refuse to walk to the tv and change the channel manually.

3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Correct!!! What good is a cake if you can't eat it?

4.When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why  would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they?

5. When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No Loser, I paid £12 to come to the cinema and stare at the floor.

6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?" Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?

7. When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it.

8. When people say "life is short". Life is the longest thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?

9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come?" If the bus came, would I be standing here?

I think the most important thing in life is to:

I don't know why but when I smile I feel much better. It's weird. It's only a position to move your face in to but it is so great. Everyday, you should try to smile at someone. Maybe your best friend or someone you've never met before in your life. Just smlie!

What do you look for in a friend? Humor? Loyalty? Kindness? What makes a good friend for you? I have a few best friends. One is really funny and can always make me laugh. One is quite quiet but very loyal and very fun when she gets going. One is the meaning of cool, there's no other way to describe her! One is very smart but also quite funny. i think we're a good group. We don't see as much as one though because she went to a different school. We try to keep in touch but it's quite hard because she doesn't have a mobile phone or the internet at home (to email) but we still stay friends. What qualities do your friends have? What qualities would you like them to have? What would your ideal friend be like?

Do you know any funny song or play lyrics. Or are you embarrassed to know any. My friend knows all the words to Bob the Builder and a boy in my class loves saying the first scene of Romeo and Juliet! They're both crazy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I know the Balamory theme tune! Lol! Do you know anything like that?!

Would you ever skydive? Would you do it for free? For £1000000? Never? Reply please!

Thanks to granny51uk who originally posted this blog. Thanks. I laughed so hard when I first read this!

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting weak?

Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they already know you don't have enough money?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check with their finger when you say the paint is wet?

Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?

Why does the government require that only sterilized needles be used for death by lethal injection?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Why did Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?

If people evolved from apes, did some apes choose not to evolve?

Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?

Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the top end on your first try?

How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's all right?" Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, "That hurt, you stupid idiot?"

Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?

In Winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in the Summer, when we complained about it being to hot?

How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?

Statistics on sanity show that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then... it's you.

I think Kelly Holmes is amazing. I really want to meet her. My mum has met her because she's a journalist and she got to interview her. I'm sooooooooooooooooooooooooooo jealous!!! She's just incredible.

How old do you think I am? Read the poem I wrote in the last blog then reply. Am I a child? Am I a teenager? Am I a young adult? Am I middle aged? Am I older? What do you think? Post your thoughts please!

Don't laugh at this poem because it goes really deep for me because I knew someone who was getting seriously bullied so I wrote this poem for her:

Black is worn at a funeral

Blue sybolises sad

Being black and blue means they hate you

Enough to beat you up

Red can be angry

Like the slits up my arm

The bruises turn to yellow

Which isn't like the sun

White is the end I want to come

A knife, a drug that's all

I think my life is grey

Like stone, like rain, like tears.